BrokenLens Forums

I sometimes wonder what it's like for you now. Is there a Heaven or Hell? Where are you? Have you been reborn? It hurts me, because I don't know if you're happy now.

I'm crying. I'm so sorry.

I don't want to think about the fact that your status will be two years old soon. It hurts me. I love you so much and miss you.

I wish I could just speak to you, for one last time. Just to thank you for everything you've done for me, Pixie. I never got the chance to thank you. It hurts. Everything hurts me.

I feel like, when some people read these messages, they just like them and in their mind, they're like "Aww". But people don't understand the amount of pain that's being emptied out into these messages.

They might have lost someone. They might have been in a similar situation. But this is so much worse, I swear. The amount of pain I have felt since October 2017 is crazy. It's mental. I'm surprised I'm not going mental from it yet.

I've been so confused since you've been gone, Pixie, but there's one thing I'm sure about. I'm absolutely certain, that nobody, I mean NOBODY, should have to feel pain like this.

The pain of having a best friend, when you met them, everything fell into place. Only to have them be snatched away from you, a year later. Never being able to meet them. No chance to say goodbye, no chance for one more "I love you", no chance to thank them.

I love you, Pixie. You're an angel. Maybe that's what you'e doing. In Heaven, being an angel. I don't know if you believed in that stuff. But if it means that you're safe, happy, then I do.

Angel on earth, angel in Heaven. I love you, Pixie.

i feel ur pain
this makes me wanna cry tbh